From ENSIGN’s DECLINE by Bilbous Blub, Chapter 7 “The Crippled Years..”

“Difficult? They say Kim Stanley was difficult.  Harvey Keitel? Impossible. Shia LeBouf? Bruce Willis? Sure, they could cause a ruckus but…..they can all go stand in the corner and suck their thumbs  and wet their pants because The Ensign makes them look like a bunch of kindergartners crying over their first balloon.  Disagreeable at the slightest puff of air out of a director’s left nostril. He complains that other actors are saying their lines.  He shrieks that Craft Service is Bhopal without the smell of curry. He whines that the radio, television, heater, light fixture and general atmosphere in his trailer are all worse than a Howard Johnsons on Bikini Atoll.  His famous “is it always this bad?(sic)” riposte became the death knell heard round the show biz escutheon and after pretending, some say horrifically, to be the President of The United States with a beard that mimicked Justice Bork in a show laughingly referred to as barely coherent the Ensign….”