Tuesday, October 17, 2017

News of the Ensign

Monday, October 16, 2017

Friday, October 13, 2017


Other Pros Who Are Not Lazy Dept.

".....The narrator starts out quite weak .......
I almost didn't make it through the first third of the book because he was so weak relative to other pros....."  ***

&


"......D----- B------ i like his work in general. But I think it's distracting that he doesn't pronounce the most obvious things correctly - seems lazy. Examples; Nevada & Boalt Hall........"         ***




***all critiques guaranteed verbatim 

Sunday, October 08, 2017

Thursday, October 05, 2017

Wednesday, October 04, 2017

Sunday, October 01, 2017

Friday, September 29, 2017

Thursday, September 21, 2017

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Saturday, September 09, 2017

Thursday, September 07, 2017

A NOSH: vol.5



Ensign and CMMDR are shown to a table in an eatery in upper Manhattan.

ENSIGN: You want to sit HERE?
CMMDR: No, I just thought I'd rest for a bit until we get to the table you want to sit at.
ENSIGN: Fine. Fuck it, we'll sit here.
CMMDR: No, you choose the table.
ENSIGN: No, we'll sit here. Fuck it. It's fine. If you’re a fan of confinement.
CMMDR: Well I see why you might be put out - you're just so much taller than me....
ENSIGN: (sitting) What's that noise?
CMMDR: That's the sound of 'being in a restaurant.'
ENSIGN: Remind me why I spend time with you.
CMMDR: (looking at menu): Oh, hey. Here's a noise cancellation appetizer you might like.
ENDIGN: (checking his phone) Hmmmm.
CMMDR: What?
ENSIGN: Just a little something.
CMMDR: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE?!
ENSIGN: Huh.
CMMDR: Please just tell me what you have. Is it TV? A film? I won't feel less than, I promise. Is it a book-on-tape? Tell me it's a book-on-tape, that's fine with me as I don't do books on tape-
ENSIGN: No one does books on tape ASSHOLE. They stopped doing them when earth was a fetus.
CMMDR: I don't care anyway. I'm backing off from the whole thing anyway.
ENSIGN: You sure they THEY'RE not backing off?
WAITRESS: How are we tonight gentleman?
ENSIGN: That’s your opening gambit?
CMMDR: We’re fine, thank you. I had a sax lesson today and my friend the Ensign is Jewish.
WAITRESS: Would you like to hear our specials?
ENSIGN: Where is all this noise coming from? Who’s responsible for all this noise? I’ll kill him, I’ll kill him with a gun.
CMMDR: Could you give us a minute?

To be continued….


Friday, August 25, 2017

PRE-TEXT JITTERS....

Ensign talking to someone who knows the CMMDR  Well.....


-Hey--what are you doing? 
-I’m about to send a text to Johnny Boy
-You sure you want to do that?
-Shouldn’t I?
-Well, let me ask you something.
-Go ahead.
-Is it about HIM?
-No, just a little something that was happening to me. I thought he’d be interested. 
-Oh..
-WHAT?
—That’s  not good.
—Jeez, why? He’s my friend.  I think of him as my friend…
--So there's nothing about him at ALL??
--No
--Absolutely nothing?? ZERO??a
—No…is that bad? 
—Well…..he won’t be interested.
—Oh
—You’ll probably just get a 'HUH' in response……
—Oh, that would hurt.
—Yeah……..Unless…
—Unless what?
-Well……Did you have a conversation with someone recently where his name came up?  
-No.
-Too bad. He’d perk up and want to know the details…. maybe You’ve passed a poster of a show he might be in?  
-Nope. 
-Seen something online?
— Gosh, No.
-Even something online about ANYONE ANYWHERE who might be tangential to his career that you could casually mention??
-No.
-WAIT. I KNOW. This is surefire:   Did you get any job offers?
-In fact: yes.
-Perfect!
-A few actually.
—A FEW? A FEW!!  OH MY GOD THAT IS THE ANSWER!!!   My friend you’ve hit the mother lode!!!    Try texting, casually, off-handedly,  that you were juggling a few job offers and MY GOD within seconds he’ll reply and stay with you till you tell him every last detail.
-Hmmmm….But I just want to send him this picture. Its not a big deal…
-Um…
-So, you’re saying I shouldn’t send it?
-I am. Unless you don’t mind being belittled. 
—pause— 
-I’m going to risk it.


-Okay…don’t say I didn’t warn you…..

to be continued

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

THE TRUTH HURTS DEPT

ON AUDIBLE:   What does D***** Bou****************** bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

“He gave a good reading, with seemingly appropriate intonation. However, at times he became a bit irritating.”

Saturday, August 12, 2017

The Ensign's last Arc