Monday, December 14, 2015

THE MAIL BAG IS OVERFLOWING!

Gentlemen!

Only a few more shop (lifting) (HA) Days till Xmas. Wondering if you have any suggestions for my

husband?  He's hard to shop for and very tall.

Ho Ho

Louise Lickem
St. Flappinatem, Maine


Dear LOUISE

Oh, the holidays!  There's not much time so let's get right to it:

For the man who has everything?
A Comb is always a pleasant surprise (except for the CMMDR --he uses a wash cloth for styling).

A terrarium filled with little castles for his collection of fish.  (If no fish, a good place to keep his comb-see above)(at the CMMDR's house they use the Terrarium for discarded notes. My favorite: TO-Do TODAY! One push-up)

Other stocking stuffers: Spools of wire, Weather Cubes, Elegante Meats and Cheeses.
(at the CMMDR's house they call something else a "stocking stuffer", but we'll leave you to guess what that is) (Hint: Its the other foot.)


DEAR HWHN

Is it wrong?


Ashamed
Goat Head Lane, MT

Dear Ashamed:

Yes. You're going straight to hell.



Sirs!

Been reading your 'blog' for a while and I have some difficult(sic) telling who is who.

Also, can I ask another question?

Robert Spredenchees

Alajaurtaos, NM

Hi Robert

Sorry, one question per letter.

Here's a handy way of telling us apart:  The CMMDR is the one whose resume includes rubber, glue, tentacles and a decision to not move with "Only Kidding" to Off Broadway.

The ENSIGN was in STAT.

Hope that helps!  HAPPY NEW YEAR!

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