Cmmdr to Throw in the Towel!

This Friday, at an undisclosed location (though rumors suggest it’s an alley behind an Arby’s Roast Beef in Mar Vista), the Cmmdr will be throwing in the towel. ‘I’ve had it,’ stated the short fat creep, visibly shaking with anger. ‘I cannot get a fucking job and I’ve fucking had it!’ In his grubbly little paw he grasped a small white bath towel. This reporter asked if that was the towel he’d be throwing in. ‘No, this is just a towel I happen to have with me,’ said the unemployed idiot. ‘The real towel,’ continued the bald trite vapid shit head, ‘is back at my house.’ Who will witness this upcoming ceremony? ‘No one,’ said the failure. ‘Not one person,’ he added. Why now? Why not years ago? ‘I guess I could’ve thrown the towel in earlier,” admitted the failure.