Monday, March 09, 2015

Word(s) of the Day

adj. lacking wit or sense
adj.  ignorant
n. gross stupidity

(an audition is in progress)

ENSIGN (mid-audition scene)(In an angry voice) "...and we move for acquittal your Honor.".
Casting Director: Thank you. That was..
ENSIGN:  (trying not to be surly) Should I do the next scene?
CD:  Uh, no that's okay, I think we have it. Have a nice-
ENSIGN: (Barely holding on to civility) But I prepared the-
CD:  No, that's fine.  Thanks for coming in.
ENSIGN: (He May Blow) Hey, great, thanks, no problem. Always glad to drive all the way in and pay the toll at the GW Bridge and find a place to park and then drive home in the rush hour traffic. Bye. Sorry to have bothered you. Thanks again.
(He leaves)
CD: (picks up phone, dials) (Laughing) Hi its me.  You would not believe the  audition I just sat through. It was so INSULSE....Hold on, let me play it back for you over the phone...(she does)(we can barely make out the words but we can hear Ensign's strident caustic bitter strident loud tone)
VOICE ON PHONE:  Jesus..that guy sound like a PARVISCIENT Jew. How do you stand it?
CD I know, right? I have to go.  (turns off phone) Next!
(CMMDR Enters)
CMMDR: Hey, Hi. How ya doing? I'm so happy to be back in NY because-
CD: Not so close. Stand on the mark please.
CMMDR: Hey if everyone was fat, the world would be closer together.  Heh heh. THere's my mark and i'm Crushing it. How am I doing so far? Heh heh.
CD: Just slate your name please.
CMMDR: Oh, hey, right, yep..CMMDR. (in a funny Irish type voice) That's me Moniker. You know You and I have met bef--
CD: And what role are you reading for?
CMMDR: You mean what role am I going to get..heh heh., uh, Accountant #2?
CD: Start Anytime.
CMMDR:  Anytime, Any-hoo...heh heh. Okay, Let me just organize these among yourselves, heh heh...Can I have some water?
CD: (under her breath) My god, the CRASSITUDE....

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