Fwd: [The Failure Digest (He Who Has Nil)] FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: LIL' BUDDY TO PLAY DEAD TRANSLATOR

    FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:  LIL' BUDDY TO PLAY DEAD TRANSLATOR

Lil' Buddy will join previously annouced stars Billy Crudup, Richard Easton, Jennifer Ehle, Ethan Hawke, Josh Hamilton, Amy Irving and Brian F. O'Byrne, to play the role of Constance Garnett, in Lincoln Center Theater's production of "The Coast of Utopia," Tom Stoppard's trilogy about the 19th Century Russian intelligentsia. Lil' Buddy was undaunted by the prospect of playing a character who does not actually appear in the nine-hour, butt-numbing epic. "People ask me, 'Are you uncomfortable playing a woman?' Of course not! What's far more challenging is playing someone who is never actually onstage." Mr. Buddy claims to have years of experience to draw upon. "I'm rarely noticed," he said, "which is something I can tap into." It was at the turn-of-the-previous century that the indefatiguable Constance Garnett translated much of Mr. Stoppard's source-material for the three plays: the memoirs of Russian proto-revolutionaries Alexander Herzen and Mikhail Bakunin, and the letter and novels of their countryman, Ivan Turgenev. "I think of her as very much an influence on the playwright," said Mr. Buddy. Mr. Stoppard could not be reached for comment. (Actually, we didn't bother trying to reach Mr. Stoppard--ed.) Mr. Buddy has been laying in a bathtub filled with icewater to prepare to play Ms. Garnett, who is dead. He has also been reading a lot of Garnett's work, and brushing up on his Boggle. "Playing Boggle is a great way to pass the time off-stage," said Lil'. "But shaking up those cubes in the wings can be noisy, and distract from the action onstage. So I wrap the shaker up in a towel!" He wrapped a Boggle-shaker up in a terry-cloth bathtowel, one recently thrown in by the CMMDR, and shook it. The sound of the cubes was, indeed, muffled. Mr. Buddy smiled, and wiped a little spittle off his chin."Look!" he cried gaily, unwrapping the shaker and pointing at the letters inside. "It spells 'cat.'" The role of Constance Garnett was last assayed by Meryl Streep at the Yale School of Drama, in Christopher Durang's "The Idiots Karamazov." Ms. Streep famously haranged delighted audiences during the curtain call, screaming at them, "Go home! Go home!" as the house-lights came up. "It's the role that got her noticed," the indefatiguably cheerful Mr. Buddy chirrupped. "Maybe it will do the same for me!" He then excused himself and went and stood behind a curtain, invisible once more. "Sorry, more homework!"

--
Posted by Lil' Buddy to The Failure Digest (He Who Has Nil) at 8/29/2006 12:33:00 PM