From the New York Times, Sunday, April 25, 2023; How a Minor Character Actor Spends His Sundays

 

I get up about 7 AM and go to the kitchen to make coffee. I’ll spill most of the grounds the first time I try to make the coffee and then while I’m clearing up that mess I will throw out my back. Boy that hurts! Once the coffee is ready I’ll put a little milk in the cup but it will splash over the edge of the cup and on to the counter and some will spill onto the floor and onto my feet. Cleaning it all up will take me about 15 minutes. Back hurts even more now.

Then the coffee ready, I take the cup to my desk and sit down and make a list of the things that I need to worry about. It will take me 5 hours.

Around one PM if it’s a nice day in NY, I’ll think about contacting my children until I remember that I never had any. 

I’ll go to the living room and sit for a while and read the paper and look for a piece of nicotine gum to chew. I can’t find them usually and will have to search around the apartment. This could take up to 45 minutes. I tend to mis-locate things, not only on Sunday but also on Mondays and Tuesdays and Wednesdays and Thursdays and Fridays and Saturdays as well. Then, exhausted, I’ll take a nap. 

Around 3 o’clock I’ll exchange some meaningless caustic banter with Slim and the Giant Tyrant, two friends what have actual lives and families. 

At five I’ll have a can of salmon and some beans. 

Then it’s another hour at my desk, organizing a list of the reminders I’d taken during the day of things. Just things I would like eventually to do with my life.

Then around 8:30 PM I’ll write a few more reminders, and spend some quality time ruminating. I’ll worry, regret, lash out at people from my past, bemoan, and practice 15 minutes of deep self-loathing.

Then it’s back to sleep for this tired old fool.